black and gold

I don't know why, but my heart has been hurting for the whole night plus this morning till now. It's like this echo-y feeling plus a dull pounding accompanying it. No matter how much I try to think happy thoughts it just there. It's like I'm afraid of something but I don't know what it is.

You know how I can sleep like a log and nothing can wake me? I've never woken up in the middle of the night ever. Once I sleep, I'll only wake up in the morning when I'm all rested and stuff. But for the past few nights, I've been waking up at 3am plus around there and can't get back to sleep until I toss and turn for 30mins?? I don't know.

Last night/This morning, I just woke up suddenly cos my heart starting hurting. Not physically but aiyah, don't know how to say it. And i couldn't get rid of the pain no matter how much I tossed and turned. I don't know how I managed to get back to sleep, but I did eventually, thank God.

Please pray for me. sigh.

This just happened in my humble abode.

J: "Dad, I think our stove has a bit of a problem. Some of the gas doesn't get combusted sometimes.."

I wanted him to tell me why and to explain scientifically.

D: "Orrrhhh.. Come come.." walks over to the stove and starts dismantling it
     "You see ah, this part not rotating....yada yada" starts using spanner and screwdriver, vigorously trying to unscrew the screw.

So this goes on for five minutes and I'm just walking around the kitchen grabbing slices of cake and what not.

D: "Aiyah, the residues are hindering the screw from turning. Nevermind, we'll just put it back"

After replacing the stove, he tests out the stove

D: "Eh, this one suppose to light which one?" Turning the knob of the three different cooking place

All three were working before this. Now, only one works.

Mum's gonna kill him!!!!
xD

J: "Shall we buy you a clock to dismantle?"

My dad loves dismantling things. He has an inquisitive mind. When he was a kid, he tried this experiment: If a 12V battery can cause the motor to move with such a fast speed, what would a 230V power supply do???

The motor exploded.

Peace out, Janice-town

Yupp, so in two weeks time, my forehead will be bombarded with pimples and I will most probably be walking around mumbling weird equations and nonsensical reactions in the attempt to try to revise my work on the move. That does not seem desirable at all. The worse thing is that I can't seem to gather a sense of urgency that is ever-so-present in the typical Wafflesian's life.

Sigh, freaking worried but what can I do? Just try my best lor.

I'm at Ngee Ann Poly now, trying to study. xD Came looking for my bro who immediately went, "she's my sister." Like duh, would anyone think I'm anything but?? HAHAHA. It's quite fun to study here. It's not complusory to spend money here in order to occupy a seat and there's no fattening french fries full of trans-fats to tempt me! How wonderful! (:

But I did eat a pack of mini Chipsmore and Dewberry, so sue me! xD

HAHA, ok, break time's over. I'm accomplishing quite a bit today.

MENTALIST at ten! Go home and watch it!

:D

whoo hoo~~~

peace out, Janice town.

The day started with me going through my  morning routine very much asleep. Ended up leaving the house very late but couldn't be bothered to walk faster. Saw EYEBAGS at the bus stop at RTC lol. So anyway, the day continued to be boring and I fell asleep whenever I could.

So I slept in between classes, during classes, after lunch and after my run. It was fun! (: Audrey and Sylviane decided I would make great drawing paper by decorating my arm with an elbow smile. You know the one where the smile becomes bigger when you bend your elbow? Yeah that. Oh, not to forget the slanted fangs that Syl drew. Then during lunch, Emily decided I was grafitti wall material and wrote *** (censored to save em from utter embarassment).

Ran 6 plus km in 55mins at MacRitchie, which was 7mins faster than 2wks ago. YAY.

Rachel, Glad's wife, came to RJ for the first time today and she bumped into me! so lucky. xD (actually, I was being quite retarded, stretching on the canteen floor after running) Exchanged pleasantries.. yupp

Ok, I know you're sleeping now! Cos I'm falling asleep talking about my oh-so-boring life.

School starts at 930am tmr, how lovely.

NIGHT! <3

peace out, Janice town

HAHAHA, ok, quick one.

Life's been good (and bad) the past few weeks. I'm coming to treasure the time I can spend with my awesome BC girls cos Sunday comes around too slowly (and too quickly). Prelims are coming soon so I should speed up my revision. Key word: should. xD

So I just finished my SGC thanks to Yisheng. HAHA. End up my SGC was pretty screwed but I finished with 15mins to spare. HEE HEE.

Jit star's 19th today. Went to Sakura (again) and gained 5kgs eating all that food. Was super funny but my fingers are frozen so I shall stop here.

So much for sleeping at 1030. xD

NIGHT AND LOVES.

peace out, Janice-town

P.S (I love writing laterally inverted)

This is my prayer in the desert,
 When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need,
 My God is a God who provides

This is my prayer in the fire,
 In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved of more worth than gold,
 So refine me Lord through the flames

I will bring praise, I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

This is my prayer in the battle,
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ,
So firm on His promise I'll stand

I will bring praise, I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, and I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

All of my life, in every season
You are still God, I have reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

All of my life, in every season
You are still God, I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

I will bring praise, I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, and I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

(favourite verse)
This is my prayer in the harvest
Where favour and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
This seed I received I will sow...

Try out the title, it's really good exercise. xD

Anyway, exams are coming round the corner and I haven't gotten down to revising yet-what a genius. My CTs were so screwed I don't know what's going to happen for As. sigh.

Kexin's coming back, Elliot's worried, I'm lost. Such wonders.

Gotta finish chem focus (physical chem), work plan review and leadership thingy by tonight. GGXXBB.

seeya!

P.S I love korean songs man

I know it's super cowardy of me, but sometimes I just wanna run away from it all. I'm just super afraid that I wouldn't be able to live up to my parents', grandparents', family's, friends' and teachers' expectations of me. I know its not as if I have a major burden cos everyone has this too. But most importantly, I want to be able to live with myself. I have this need to excel. I know it's stupid like, come on lah Janice, don't be such a perfectionist and what not, but I just can't help it. I have a fear - failure. I don't ever wanna fail. But know what's the worst part? I haven't started studying. I also have great plans like, I finish all my schoolwork on the weekdays so I can revise other topics on the weekend but it's just so hard. The moment there's people around me, I have this need to hang out with them instead of doing what I need to do.

That's all going to change now. It has to. I shall be totally antisocial except on maybe two days a week so my social life won't be ziltch. I must must study. Don't go, aiyah Janice, you RJ one, confirm can make it. I'm telling you, these days I don't have the confidence anymore. Time's creeping up on me and I'm super worried about failure. I feel like it's possible to get the results that I want. But time is just a factor I can't ignore.

Everyone is like, don't worry lah Janice, you can make. I wanna believe it, I gotta believe it. But it's just so hard.

HAHAHA. Love that song. Its 'Jenny' by flight of the conchords. Super funny man!

So exams are over but it makes me feel worse cos I know I'm not ready for A levels yet and I'm so tired, I want to sleep but I can't. Woke up at 730 without the help of the alarm clock cos I'm too used to waking up early

really tired now, really wanna sleep.. but there's tchoukball. I don't know how to play and how to get there. sigh, tired tired tired.

HAHAHA, was watching the videos made by tpcmm on youtube. NICE.

Anw, I shall write a quick update cos Glad's complaining.

Erm, nothing much this week cos I was studying everyday. But still didn't cover a lot of things lah. I'm freaking screwed already. Econs is on monday and I haven't started. what the crap.

OH! A few funny things happened this week. Celebrated the ATOM PANG'S birthday yesterday (the day before, whatever) at Sakura at YCK. Super fun can? Make fun of glenn, jia hao and almost everyone there. Then when we were walking out, Jit didn't want to climb the VERY LOW fence/barricade. Damn funny, All of us cross le then just stare at him. Until Aloy climbed back and told Jit he will push Jit's butt. haha.. then Jit finally climbed lah. Or else he'll still be there. LOL. When we were all climbing, look like this big gang going for gang fight lah!!! So funny.

Oh, today we went to Bishan Library to study after the library in school closed and a short game or bball. Sat at the multimedia station when we were supposed to but there were no more tables! xD Then one of the staff came ands said we couldn't sit there and how the public paid to use the computers and what not. Then bryden and yanjie were totally acting damn guai and whatever lah. Go charm the lady until she said, ok fine, this once. LOL. Then the security guard came and said we couldn't sit there then the lady came out and went " only today can" HAHA totally lub the security guard. Then bryden and yj went to CHARM THE SECURITY GUARD also! By the time we left right, I think we buddies with her already!

Crashed cafe cartel and attempted to study there. LOL stayed there till close to 11 then we left. All in all, fun and relatively fruitful day.

Leaders' retreat tmr, better study too. LOL

peace

P.S( Pray for me man. CTs, CTs, CTs... sigh)

So it was YM@Sentosa on Sunday morning to afternoon and RProject in the evening. They were great. Both of them.

We had loads of fun at Sentosa, dunked Elly, some of the HYPER-nites and they dunked me (and I wonder why I went so willingly).  Makes me wonder after Elly goes back to NZ am I gonna get dunked at every event near a body of water? I shall have to find a substitute. xD

Anyway, HYPER came in FIRST  for the games and we have $80 Ben and Jerry's ice cream voucher!!! whoots!!! xD Gonna celebrate on thurs. (:

RProject meant looking at the creations of Rafflesians and I have to say I was impressed with both the models and the designs(well, some of them anyway). Whole night was fun all in all.

Yesterday was ACJC's choir performance. Went to support Brian Chan. It was an entertaining evening except I got blisters out of it. xD Don't wanna elaborate le. xD

ok, done!

Peace

So that's the song that Isaac's playing now. xD

Anyway, the highlight of this post is that I, Janice Yun, corrected TAN ZHIBIN in a MATHEMATICS question!!!!! XD

ok, bye!

Something occurred today and it made me remember that no matter how much we try to close ourselves up to the world and how it makes us feel, we can't escape from reality and that deep down, we are all still humans.

Many a times as we grow older and experience different things, they affect us and the way we respond to them. It sort of decides how we react to similar things in the future. Some of learn that it's better to cry when we're sad or express our anger so that we won't harbour it inside. But most of us find it a need to "harden" our hearts to the wide range of emotions we feel and it's only in desperate times that our true feelings show.

Let's just say that I saw the human within with a few of my friends and it was shocking that I realised that I have never seen them so..... open before. It's like when you shake a coke bottle and it explodes when you twist the cap. wow.

congrats badminton! :D

First line that popped into my head. Listened to it while I was running.

So this weekend is dubbed THE SLACK WEEKEND but yours truly. I slacked on saturday and on sunday. Hence, slack weekend. LOL.

I slept in yesterday after one whole week of sleeping for 5 hours every night. Not bad, but not enough. xD Went for a pathetic run cos I am so unfit now so i was dying after 4 rounds round the estate. pathetic. Maybe I'll blame the sun cos I was running at 10 plus plus. xD

Went for the sports school's open house to see my ex-school mates and teachers. Got pulled into buying a pencil ice cream from Ms. Kelly and painting my hand for Sheena. xD It was fun talking to the people I haven't seen since december, really too long. Didn't manage to talk to Mr. Mak, Mr. Lau and Ms. Ong, so sad.
 
Went to meet Nessa at vivo after that to shop. Wasn't a bad trip all in all. Got a basic tank top (cos of the HORRIBLE weather) and a slightly more feminine top. Saw a pair of wedges at Pull and Bear and it is SUPER DUPER NICE!!!! But don't think my mum would allow me to get something so expensive.. sigh..

After that was K-box with SSPTT! So fun! We sang so many songs and screamed into the mic at times. That is the bomb man. I even sang a few chinese songs. Couldn't read a lot of the words cos they were fan ti zi so kok and ps were reading the words out before I sang it!!! So joke! :D

Today was combine service at church followed by the last session of YLT. Good experience. After that was family lunch followed by SHOPPING with my mum. Bought a pair of heels and yet another tank top. xD The heels are really comfortable actually, can't wait to wear them. :D

Went running with my dad after that. Definitely better than yesterday's run. Ran for approximately 40mins and slacked for the rest of the time my dad was running. Make me feel unfit cos my dad was wearing weights and he ran for slightly more than an hour! xD But good run lah. xD

Zane's reading some really funny stuff to me now! xD

So today was relatively fun because Sarah and myself 'guai lan' SYL-VAN for the whole day and she was just so "game" because everything she did could be 'guai-lan'-ed. xD We were on a roll lah.

Feel mega-accomplished cos I finished all my homework for the week. Well sorta anyway. Left chem summary which he gave us only today so I'm thinking how to work around it. hmm.. I feel the mugger within. =P

Claire did exceptionally well for her exams so I'm really proud of her. Makes me feel like a slacker every time she tells me she's going to do her work then after one hour plus says she's done cos I take super long to do my work. xD And her breaks are only 10mins while mine are... let's just say they really are BREAKS. xP

Going to try to watch bones without any interruptions in the streaming.

Oh, regarding the title of this entry? I used that line cos it popped into my head. I find titling my entries really difficult and by the time I think of a suitable one, I forget what I wanted to say in the first place. xD

Btw, I just typed the paragraph above without looking at the keyboard. Impressive for someone who used to type with two fingers before PW started. xD

PEACE. ^ ^ v

So I'm using the computer for the first time this week so all's good.

Church has been wonderful, I grow to love HYPER and BC more and more. One's so cute and cuddly (sssh, don't tell them, they'll probably run away from me in fear) and the other one, we're just getting closer and helping each other through life and our relationship with God.

Elly led his last lesson in HYPER today and they were awesome (elly and the kids). Making me feel a little scared that I won't be able to pull it off but after this bible study session with BC, I'm feeling a little bit more confident. A bit.

School's becoming bearable, but homework's making me feel stressed cos I don't know how to do some questions. To top it off, I haven't really revise my last year's work and I'm feeling really really stressed. But it isn't about me in this world so I shall focus on other things.

So Elly is leaving. I think I will miss him a lot. His views on stuff are really deep and I never really thought about stuff like that before. So yeah, I'll miss him.

YM at Sentosa is coming up so I'm excited and sad (refer to para above). The youths are really cute and looking forward to this too and I hope they'll have a fun time and assimilate into YM culture soon and continue on their journey with God. I love HYPER.

Feel quite happy with myself this weekend cos I did alot of stuff. I FILED MY STUFF. Like, all of them. So now I have 6 really thick files on my shelf and my J1 stuff is on the floor. xD And I'm almost done with maths remedial, finished econs, chem and quantum revision so far but there's always more. xD

Going to watch bones now, only one episode. :D

Bye world! <3

I am so proud of myself. I finished all my homework!! yes, ALL MY HOMEWORK.

shock, shock, horror huh. xD

I'm trying to update my blog more so less people will complain. xD

janice.

Fats, the root of all my problems.

When I find myself out of breath during training, the first thing that comes to mind is my incredible amount of fats. Who knew they could accumulate like the speed of light??? I feel inertia with every step I take = too much fats. xD

Know what's worse? I keep on adding to it. Went to Macs with my bro just now cos he didn't want to come home so early. Ordered TWO LARGE FRIES. Then we asked for MAYO, BBQ SAUCE, KETCHUP AND CHILLI. He mixed mayo and BBQ sauce and we ate like no tomorrow!!!! OH NO. Then I got frisbee tomorrow. Sigh.. Then, he bought bubble tea for us somemore!!!! I ordered OREO CHOCOLATE!!! sigh.

But life isn't so bad. I did most of my homework this week, if only I can keep it up. My maths sucks. Need tutor pronto!

Ok, don't wanna blog already. Seeya peeps!

janice

 I know my blog is like, officially dead. But that's cos I forgot I even had one. xD

So anyway, life's been okay lately. My table tennis season is over and it's time to start studying. Really afraid I can't get things done in time. Really need to put in more effort for maths cos it's a doable subject so I shall start practicing more. But most importantly, I need a maths tuition teacher!!! Might try Syl's one, or maybe yiyun's and sophie's one?? Harrold's in camp so very hard to get tuition. sigh, I need a maths brain. xD

So I'm at Sarah's house now where we are supposed to be studying but I'm using the computer and she's sleeping. LOL. But I'm going to start after this cos I have to finish this maths worksheet tomorrow(see, effort). And I so need to understand probability and binomial and poisson distribution. HAHAHA!

Went to the dentist just now, horrible horrible. I already detest going to the dentist. And to make things worse, I have really sensitive teeth so that sucks.

I'm looking forward to the holiday on monday. Need to catch up on a million and one things. sigh, A levels, quickly pass please!

I really love my youths. They are so cute and active all the time and the things they message me randomly during the week is so adorable!!!!

Oh ya, Elly's leaving soon so it's up to Liz and I to hold the fort! ):

God bless,
Janice